just because

things i've learned lately: gabe is hilarious. he loves tools, cars and any toy that makes noise. the more obnoxious the better. he also likes to dance with the "beat" of the washing machine, dryer and dishwasher. his birth mom is delightful. (i knew that but am constantly reminded.) is it weird that i love her so much? i wanted to adopt her too the day we met her. my husband is a nut. he works in the yard and swims in a tilly or tully hat? whatever it is, i laugh. gabe is NOT afraid to jump in the pool, go under water or climb in & out of the pool. i, on the other hand, stay tense the entire time he is near a pool. gabe + stuffed snake + buzzing noise = awesome. he is so.dang.funny. compliments from my mom mean the world to me. my nieces are AWESOME. addison had me laughing nonstop at her birthday party. here's some of our conversations: me: "dd, what made you choose a baked potato bar instead of pancakes for your bday party this year?"

i have no idea what i'm about to blog about. thats always dangerous. i told jay earlier this week that i want to find other pointless blogs (like mine) to read. i am weird. i'm NOT theological, analytical, etc. i just like dumb facts, simple information...i just like to know people. so i want to read blogs that tell me what folks do during the day, funny things that happen, etc. help me find some to follow :) i can't help but laugh that i skipped my run yesterday so jay could sleep in. gabe typically wakes up around 7am. homeboy slept til 9am. aaaaahhhhhh, hahaha. sorry jay :)  we all got to sleep in. thanks Gabe! gabe owed it to me though. i have completely lost a drawer in our bathroom b/c i can't keep gabe out of it. the kid LOVES it. i thought i got all of the fingernail polish out and up higher. apparently i missed one b/c i saw him turn the corner into our closet with it. then i smelled polish fumes...he had busted that mug open. it was all over the floor, h

i read a blog yesterday about adoption. it was a mom talking to her two adopted children about their birth mom.  they were young but old enough to understand their adoption and know the difference between her and their biological mom. i won't lie, it made me a bit anxious about gabe. her kids kept saying they missed their "real mom."  that hurt my heart. that may sound selfish. i do sometimes feel like i'm not a "real mom" because i didn't give birth to gabe. i know thats a lie. but i do struggle with it. or i think that other people don't think i'm a "real mom." ...i'm weird. you know what proves that this is a silly fear... no part of me thinks anyone would think jay isnt a "real dad" so why do i give myself such a hard time? the truth is...gabe is a gift. he is Gods child that He entrusted to us. i love, appreciate and admire Gabe's birth mom. i think she is very brave, loving and unselfish! i want to celebrate

i have been grumpy for about a week. i'm ashamed to admit it but it's true. i know that i am obnoxiously blessed with a great life, job, family, etc. but i have just been ILL. i haven't been sleeping very well. that's probably got something to do with it. this girl loves sleep. honestly, most nights when i snuggle into bed i thank God for the idea of sleep. perfect idea He had. between gabe's random wake ups and jays snoring my sleep is hardly ever sound. but i wouldn't trade those 2 for a good nights rest. i have threatened for the past week or so to check into a hotel for a night. now that sounds gooooooood. my job is one of my favorite parts of life. but last week caused a little anxiousness. oh LAWD. but i think it's resolved and i actually think i like the new plan better. yay. jay knows something is wrong with me if i am quiet. he knows if i am talking 100 miles an hour that life is GOOD. monday night i hardly spoke. he knew i was stressed.