nap time = boring blogs

well gabe is taking a nap so i figured i'd blog. (mainly b/c it will keep me distracted or i may EAT all afternoon. ravenous.)

i asked jay to hide the cheerios today b/c i've almost eaten the entire box. he put them on top of the fridge. well done, jay.

i keep waking up at 2am. not sure why. but when i do, i eat cheerios. i found one by my pillow while making the bed the other morning. oh yes, i ate it.

i asked jay what i should blog about. he said funny people in my life.

i feel like almost everybody in my life is funny. i'll just think of people and tell you about them...

my dad. ohhhhh norman. here's why he's funny. he LOVES to give unnecessary information. like last week, he called to see if we wanted to use their gps to get to the mountains. i said yes. keep in mind - gps gives directions. he couldn't help himself. he STILL started giving me step-by-step directions to north ga. i even said, "dad, i am not listening." he kept talking. THEN he printed out the directions and gave us the gps. thanks dad.   how can you not love him?!

jays mom. she is hilarious. sometimes i think she's not paying attention to the conversation and then she busts in with the funniest comment. she's very witty and she never misses a beat! she will jank on you in a heartbeat. except for jay...she doesn't make too much fun of him. she does make fun of him spelling his name "jae." thank God. i hate that spelling. she's almost always saying something silly. fun lady, you should meet her.

my mom. she doesn't think she's funny but she IS. sometimes she says things and i laugh about it for days. she mainly makes fun of herself. she loves to laugh. she thinks my brother and i are the funniest people ever. we probably aren't funny at all...but we think we are b/c she will always laugh.  my mom is good a pretty much everything except matching socks. she's the WORST. it makes me laugh.

i wonder if this will offend people or if they'll think its strange. but whatever. we were allowed to cuss in our house growing up IF we were using the word for humor. we couldn't cuss out of anger and get away with it. i love that about my parents. sometimes cussing just makes a sentence/story extra funny. i don't cuss in front of gabe but i still do it for humor.

side note - some guy told me today that i look like a thinner version of some actress from "walking dead." i've never seen it. i googled it. uhh....which one do i look like?

one of the funniest people i know is kerryjo brooks. she was my roommate in college for a while and a great friend growing up. we laugh a lot about random things we did in college. i wish i could tell stories but i'm scared people that they involve might read this... bathing suit. OH how i want to tell you the story about the bathing suit.

the staff i work with are super funny. i think anna justice is fun b/c she has NO CLUE how cute she is. she is "that girl" that can wear ANYTHING and look precious. she can be dressed up and look perfect or not match, have on clothes 3 sizes too big and still be perfect. i kinda hate her in my heart for that. we are a lot alike. we both love to watch the food network, we love our alone time, and we get grumpy about the same things.

molly baker can always make me laugh. she can imitate any accent. and homegirl loves some kirk franklin. please ask her about kirk.

i feel like i should make fun of myself since i janked on my dad.

strange things about me:
i love to eat the skin of potatoes. i even eat other peoples. i get sad when i see people leave the skin on their plate. really it almost offends me.

i always (no exaggeration) want a bite of the food people are eating around me. except for certain sweet things. like i don't really care about a bite of a cookie. but french fries, sandwiches, meat, etc. yes please!

even though i always want people to share their food with me, it really hurts my heart to have to share mine with others. even gabe.

i can't stand to shower with the door shut.

i listened to christmas music 3 days this week. yes, its october 12.

i don't drink much at all after 4pm. if i do, i have to get up in the night & go to the bathroom. i'm like a 70 year old.

i typically taste gabes baby food. do other parents do that? i feel like i should.

i think diarrhea is hilarious. and i love to hear people tell stories about it.

i can't spit.

i put jelly on saltine crackers.

i wish that i was more confident in large groups. i tend to feel like a big nerd. especially downtown or at parties. i feel like a wannabe! not that anyone is even looking at or paying attention to me...but i feel like i stand out like that girl that wishes she was cool. ha.

i have always wanted to be a bartender (but i know nothing about alcohol.)

i don't like it when adults wear clothes with cartoon characters on it. kids either really.

i'm not a fan of stuffed animals. or real animals for that matter.

i cannot figure out how to work twitter and instagram. i have an account with both. i apologize if you "follow" me.

i think hotel breakfasts are lame if they don't have fresh waffles. the place we stayed this weekend was pitiful. they didn't even have highchairs. is that legal??

i learned this weekend i am not good a driving a luggage cart. oh Lord i was all over the place. jay looked like a pack mule trying to help me get stuff inside.

my friend gave me a headband last week as a part of my bridesmaid gift. i keep looking at it but don't have the nerve to wear it. it's cute though.

i own lots & lots of rings but have basically only worn my wedding ring/engagement ring for that past 6 years. i do have a rockin' coconut shell ring. thanks carolyn!

i don't wear specific makeup or use any special facial products. i just buy whatever is on sale.

same with razors and i've never bought girl shaving cream. i just use soap.

i always get gas when i'm reading cards in a drugstore. i can't believe i confessed that.

another horrible confession: i ate a day old chick-fil-a waffle fry out of aaron walls bag in the TA trashcan once.

i hate the smell of most deodorants. i don't like the powdery smelling kind. only girl smelling ones. guy stuff doesn't bother me.

i don't understand why clear deodorant isn't REALLY CLEAR...?

i like to sweep.

jay calls biscuits that you open by popping the can..."whop biscuits."

sometimes when i'm putting fries in the oven to bake i eat a frozen one.

i think toothpicks are disgusting.

i don't know where countries are on the map. its bad.

i need to stop before i completely embarrass myself.