Julianna

wow. yesterday was super exciting! my brother and his wife welcomed their 5th child into the world. precious julianna asher dunlap was born a little after 2pm. she couldn't be more perfect! she was absolutely Gods idea (we all are...i love that!) but she was a joyful surprise to our family. we already know God has big plans for her.

claire is like the champ of childbirth. i'm not kidding. she stays calm, she stays beautiful and she stays thoughtful! no lie, when jay walked in to meet julianna for the first time...claire said hello and then asked jay about his mission trip to bulgaria.   ...she had just given birth....  what a fabulous person.

the day was exciting for us all. you would've thought it was the first baby to be born into our family. (keep in mind this is 5 for josh & claire, 2 for jill and john dale, 1 for us...so we've done this!) but still we were giddy. texts constantly flowing, family piled into the waiting room and phone by our side waiting for news.

i attempted to work through the morning. i was there but my mind wasnt, ha! finally when i heard claire hit 10 centimeters i was on my way to the hospital. i arrived maybe 10-15 mins before julianna was born.

vasa was beside himself. he couldn't wait to meet her. he talked about being the big brother and continually asked if she was here yet and if his mom was ok. precious.

josh came around the corner not long after we all received the "she's here" text with our first adorable picture.

not too long after we all piled into the room to meet her. the nurses said josh could bring us all back to the room. not sure if they realized this meant like 9 or 10 of us.

we all got a turn to hold julianna. then it was time for her next feeding.

we headed back to the waiting room and soon after all the kids arrived from school. they were so so excited! it really was precious. we were kinda loud in the waiting area but what do you expect with 7 kids and jay...?

we hit up the vending machines. fruit snacks (ava and i agreed that was a poor choice. we want chocolate!), peanut and regular m&ms, peanut butter crackers, baked lays...etc was just a glimpse of what we had floating around!

weston loves his coffee. he says without it every morning he is grumpy ha! so he got a decaf coffee out of the coffee vending machine :)  he is too cute. (and a local celebrity - just ask!)

i walked around a bit with gabe and vasa. they were getting a tad rambunctious in the waiting area. we stopped by the baby icu area and prayed for those sweet babies, and vasa greeted every policeman. (he loves them!) i made gabe say thank you to all the nurses. cute boy.

after a while we got to head back to see claire and julianna again. jay was a baby hog. gabe wouldn't say baby or julianna out loud. he would only whisper it....ok that was precious.

i confessed this to my friend madison yesterday...but there was a moment after seeing julianna that my heart ached at the fact that i may never have a biological child. i see/hear the comments on fb often about "feeling the baby move or kick, etc" and i wonder what that is like.

i'm certainly not saying God can't/won't allow me to experience pregnancy. but considering my crazy hormones and post-menopausal estrogen levels (yes, i said POST and i'm 35.) i don't really see it happening...

but ya know what... thanks to a friend (shannon illges!!) i documented all my "adoption kicks." she told me before we started the adoption process to think of each phase/email/promise, etc. as our kicks that we won't feel physically. i dont think i am explaining that very well. but i do have memories of cool things God did that made our child real to us...like feeling a baby inside.

jay and i have no clue what God has for us when it comes to more children. just the other night jay suggested we pray for peace/confirmation that maybe Gabe will be our only child. so we are praying that.

jay also did the sweetest thing after saying that. he looked at gabe and said "gabe you are enough." not in a (wow, you are a lot of work kind of way!!) but in a "we love being your parents, we don't think having our 'own' baby would be any different and certainly not BETTER than g, etc."

Gabe is OURS. he is ENOUGH. he was chosen for us. he is an amazing blend of our personalities! he has our hearts, completely.

i don't ever think of him as adopted. it doesn't even cross my mind. i LOVE adoption. i love that God chose that for us. but i don't want people to think of G as adopted...

He is our son. he is funny, smart, obedient, handsome, gentle, joyful, and talented.

sure, he is adopted. and i cant wait to tell him his story, share his moms emails/prayers and help him understand that he was created just for us. Gabriel Wyatt LESLEY is his name.

his adoption is HIS STORY to tell.