oh life!

few random things to start...

- i am challenging myself to wear makeup and real clothes at least 4 days a week. we'll see how long that lasts.

- i have given up on not having calloused hands. i'm realizing you can't have baby soft hands and lift heavy weights.

- it's only wednesday. but i am super excited about saturday at 3:30. i will be on my couch, in pjs, watching UGA play. i am pumped.

Gabe update:

- hearing him "Jesus loves me" is MY FAVORITE. so darn sweet.

- he's doing so well in his big boy bed. he doesn't STAY in it...but he doesn't keep me up so who cares! jay and i laugh hearing his little feet run across his room to grab toys and run back to bed. like we can't hear it! funny kid.

sunday jay went to pull his blanket back before bedtime and toys went flying. real slick g.

last night he and i were talking about snacks that we love. (he was eating pretzels saying he liked them.) i said pretzels are overrated unless they have pb on them. but then said i love peanuts for a snack. he said yeah, me too. then we sat quietly for a couple blocks...then he said, "oh and donuts. i love donuts."  hahaha too funny. cracked me up. who knew he was still thinking about it?! 

this morning jay said "gabe i need a hug." funny g laughed and said "noooo you dont!" but he did give him one and a kiss.

speaking of that...i put him down last night, we prayed and as i was walking out he said "i need a tiss" oh my heart. 

he was talking on his cell phone when i came home on monday. he talked for a second then looked at the phone and said "you still there?" hahahahaha

mom fixed his hair last week and he said "i look good." last night he told us he was handsome. k, self image seems to be intact!

speaking of self-image...oh my.

i've had a time lately. it's so interesting...

i am doing what God told me to do! i am "doing it." i am living in the freedom that He told me to. 

that being said, i still have my moments.

this freedom does mean i've gained some weight. (ps - today i tried to squeeze in some old shorts. lawd, pooooooooor choice.) 

i knew that gaining weight would happen. i've stayed pretty relaxed with it. 

but after the fall retreat i saw some pictures on FB and kinda freaked. ugh. i hate confessing that.

BUT instead of running extra or stressing myself - i went straight to HIM. i asked friends to pray. i asked jay to cover me in prayer. 

i still struggled with the pictures and the thoughts BUT they didnt consume me. in Jesus' name they will NOT define me. 

i will take those thoughts captive. 

this freedom is where i want to LIVE. being a smaller size was NOT FREEDOM for me. 

none of that matters. i want those things/thoughts/desires to be gone so i can solely focus on being who HE wants me to be. no distractions. 

keep praying for me. i know, i know i am annoying. forgive me.

now, back to fun/random stuff....

i woke up at 3:45 this morning. good times.

i dont like smart cars.

confession - i listened to christmas music for an hour or so monday. dont hate.

i had a horrible, horrible run yesterday. if every run was like that....i'd quit.

oh, i did my first 50 mile bike ride saturday! i wouldn't have enjoyed it without sweet Greg Buckner pulling...he helped us all so much! Chandrika too. it was really fun except for that BIG stupid hill out Jamestown. ooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. i cant even think about it. 

i've said it before and i will say it again. wednesday morning rides with Polly Buckner = the best way to start your day :)  what a sweet gift from God in my life. just when i needed it. i'm so thankful. 

next week i am hoping to start 2 new growth groups. i am super excited!!! i'mma be "small grouped out!" i'll have one on mondays, two on tuesdays (sometimes THREE), and one on another afternoon. did i mention i am an introvert?

isn't it strange that small groups wipe me out but if you give me a mic in front of a huge crowd i'm in my element?? i'm a freak.

i am so ready for fall. i love jeans (except none fit me right,) scarves, boots, a chill in the air (notice i did not say freezing cold!) i love running in shorts and a long sleeved tshirt. 

i think i want to paint my front door green or turquoise. 

we desperately need to paint our dining room and upstairs guest bedroom. anybody wanna help? :)

i have wrinkly hands.

i look ratchet in khaki pants.

i think the word Yikes is my new favorite. it makes me giggle.

do y'all ever make pandora mad by skipping too many songs? i do it daily.

that is all.