confessions of kaci: the mom, jays wife, TA leader, etc

i keep seeing status updates about the iPhone 6. which makes me laugh. so i thought i would confess some things about myself...and about specific areas of my life.

just kaci confessions:
- i've never had an iPhone or iPod.
- i don't know what a birch box is
- i buy my makeup at walgreens.
- except for running shoes and my tony lama boots...i've never paid more than $25 for shoes or a purse.
- i refuse to pay for a pedicure or manicure (i need my gross feet for running, thanks!)
- at 35 i have, for the first time, someone who cuts my hair. i'm almost in therapy for having to pay for it. but my cheap cuts were killing me.
- i could talk about food all day. and am almost always hungry. or at least could eat.


being a mom of an adopted son:
- i LOVE it.

but sometimes i think people don't think I'm a "real mom" because i didn't give birth to g. that may not be true but sometimes i do feel like less of a mom b/c of it.

but you know whats funny...i've NEVER thought of jay as less of a dad...strange huh?

i also wonder if he's funny, well-mannered (most of the time) and smart b/c we are his parents OR if he would've just been that way.

i'm not ONE bit ashamed that he is adopted and i hope he never is either. but i do hope that people respect that about him when he's older. i want it to be HIS story....not a way that he is introduced. ya know, this is kaci and gabe...he's adopted.

i want to share him with his biological grandparents b/c he is SOOOOOOO fun and perfect. but i can't.

BUT he's got the BEST FAMILY in the world so he's not hurting :)

i do wonder how he's going to react when he understands that he's adopted. and even though i LOVE his birth mom and HOPE they meet...i wonder if it will hurt if he clings to her.

i can ONLY imagine how hard being pregnant is. i know its uncomfortable and tough at times...but sometimes when i see/hear people complain about it i get sad. maybe bc i know i won't (probably God can do anything!) feel those pains.

i do like that about adoption though! i didn't have to go through child birth. the whole thing FREAKS me out! not to mention how "AMAZING" everyone thought i looked walking around with a newborn. to which i graciously smiled ;)


about being jays wife/pastors wife:
- he works HARD
- he doesn't just sing on sundays. it's a FULL TIME...non stop job. i promise.
- think about how many people use our church during the week....yep, most of those times he gets a phone call or two.
- on sundays, when everyone is standing around waiting to talk to him....so are gabe and i. often times we haven't seen him yet that day. sometimes i just need to say one thing or ask one question but surprisingly people don't typically "let" me.
- we don't get to sit together in church often and thats kinda sad. we've probably taken communion together twice, ever.
- when people complain - jay handles it well. it hurts my feelings. church people can be MEAN.
- i could write a book on the crazy things people have said complaining about music. lawd.
- he could always use communion volunteers - just saying.
- ministry is one job that you feel bad "clocking out"
- when jay and i got engaged, Pam Cowart pulled me aside and said, "when you get married to jay you are not marrying Christ Community Church. you do not have to sit on the front row, be at every church function or serve in every area. nobody is watching you or expecting anything from you."  that has always meant a lot to me.
- we LOVE LOVE LOVE our church though. i am thankful for a healthy church with loving staff and thoughtful people. amen!

working for TAs:
- people ask me where i work...like what my "real job" is and/or when i am going to get a "real job". awesome. thanks.
- i do love my job BUT it is not all i think about. so "after hours" which doesn't really exist in ministry - i maaaayyyyyyy not reply to your emails/texts immediately.
- oh, people seem to think we can skip work things or "just ask off" for whatever reason. makes me laugh. they wouldn't do that if i was a teacher/banker etc. (at least i don't think!?)
- we need adult helpers and can i just say it??? ... we need black people to volunteer. it helps when we want to reach out to schools like Carver (which we have AWESOME leaders for!) and Kendrick. let's be real...those students aren't going to relate to me.
- teens are FUN. i can't imagine parenting one (oh myyyy) but being their mentor/friend is fun. they stress me out but i cannot help but love them.

both of us working in ministry jobs means we are NOT rolling in da monies!!! ha. jay said God told him he had 2 options: he could make money or he could do what God called him to do. :) thankfully jay was obedient.

other confessions:
sometimes when jay isn't home (like thursday evenings) g and i eat junk and watch too much tv.

i am kinda crazy about not wasting napkins and paper towels. it stresses me out when jay uses like 7 to wipe up a cheerio.

i am a planner almost to a fault - examples:
i don't wear my glasses in the mornings (most of the time) but i move them from my nightstand to my bathroom bc i know i will need them there when i take my contacts out.

when i move one yogurt to the freezer i automatically move one up from the drawer to the top shelf to go in the freezer next. (i freeze them for an hour before i eat them...yum!)

i put everything in the same place every day and night. like ocd...

ok i'm done.


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